My Tablet Pen Needs Batteries
by Zekk
Summary: PG-13 for future language content. O_O; IZ piece.
1. Part I: Pensively Pondering of the Obvio...

[I'm in the mood to write. That happens rarely. Enjoy it while you can. o.O;]  
  
  
  
"... and further more, this superior planet was created by--"  
  
Rubbing his magenta-red eyes, the young Irken yawned in boredom. This wasn't extremely exciting to know, nor a subject one wants to have wracked into the head. Nonetheless, he kept his antennae peaked; in case of something to his own importance.  
  
"Zim! Are you paying any attention whatsoever?" The instructor waited for an answer, impatient with a lack of interest in this student.  
  
Rigid, Zim gave a swift salute. "Of course, Sir! Always! Very eager to learn!" He smiled a wide grin.  
  
"Egh..." Disgusted, he went back to pointing out information on a holographic screen. He was worried about the adolescent Irken. He wasn't unknowing of the tiny being's dominating personality and crave for self- power.  
  
It was hopeless.  
  
***  
  
Part I: Pensively Pondering of the Obvious  
  
Now older - not much wiser, mind you - Zim surveyed his temporary Earth arrangements. A degrading pile of filth, but it was his degrading pile of filth. That was all that mattered.  
  
"If I put this in there..." Gir droned on, fascinated by a a set of wires and a few sockets.  
  
"Okay Gir, this is simple: I am going to skool. Do you understand me?"  
  
"Yef..." the SIR unit muttered as he gnawed on a tube-cased wire object.  
  
The Irken raised a claw to his eyes and sighed. "Just don't eat the electrical structures."  
  
"'kay..."  
  
Zim left it at that.  
  
***  
  
"It's bad enough we have to do this project together, but the topic conjures up more discomfort." Dib retorted, watching as Zim thumbed through a text book.  
  
"I agree, Earth worm. Mating rituals of banana slugs... disgusting little things they are. Hideous." Zim glanced at the pages.  
  
"I watched this show once where--"  
  
Zim held up a claw in a silencing positioning. "Nuh-uh, don't speak."  
  
Dib cocked an eyebrow.  
  
[Did that make sense?]  
  
Ms. Bitters was supposedly ill, so Mr. Vasquez was subsituting in place.  
  
"Come my children! Take these vile candies and have your way with a 3 1/2 inch floppy disk!" He paused. "Need to write more comics...."  
  
The bell rang the students freedom, and they ran like sheep.  
  
Zim and Dib eyed a group of young girls bowing. "All hail Jhonen! He owns you!"  
  
"Damn... that's disturbing." The Irken stated.  
  
"Sure is."  
  
Zim scratched his arm. "Uh, don't we know them?"  
  
"Eh..." Dib thought to himself. "Yeah, I think we do."  
  
The two dismissed the subject, going separate ways to separate homes.  
  
Gaz sat, fixated to her GS2, the Zombie hogs gaining on her. Dib threw the door open, causing her to anger more than she already was. She scowled as her older sibling raced up stairs, boots thumping against the steps.  
  
The boy hastily grabbed his laptop and began talking with Agent Darkbootie.  
  
'Seriously... we have to complete a report together. Perhaps I can encourage a study time at his own base.' Dib hurriedly typed to his fellow eyeball.  
  
'Mothman, this is... strange. Are you positive he's an extra- terrestrial?' Darkbootie's reply came on screen, causing Dib to become anxious.  
  
'Of course! Positive! I've seen him when he wasn't incognito! I swear to you, he's an alien!'  
  
Darkbootie seen the exclaimation points and agreed with him, in order to calm the young boy down. 'Alright. We'll keep up with you. I suppose you can stay over there... in case something out of the ordinary occurs.'  
  
Dib smirked to himself as his fingers clicked across the keys. 'Oh, it will. Trust me.'  
  
***  
  
  
  
[Note: The group of people were: Zekkie/myself, Cally, Cammi, Corico, Natom, Schroe. Injoke. So shoot meeee. This took an eternity to write, and this is only Part I. Damn, I'm lazy. Nevertheless, I'll do more in the future and also update "Biscuits Always Taste Better with Doom" - the ancient fic rotting away in my asylum files.] 


	2. Part II: The Glue Bottle 'Tis Squishy

Part II: The Glue Bottle 'Tis Squishy  
  
"Why the hell do you go over and out just to spy on Zim? It's sickening." Gaz kicked her legs against the cough edge as she drew an angsty looking pig devouring a person.  
  
Dib sighed. "Gaz, you just don't understand." He glanced at her drawing. "It's... I'll explain later."  
  
He stepped out the door and made his way to Zim's home.  
  
While walking, he pondered on just how he was going to expose the Irken invader. After careful planning, he reached the door. Knocking a few times, Zim wasn't quick to answer, Dib heard some rustling and adjusting of things.  
  
Zim hastily bade Dib in and slammed the door. He was in disguise, which appeared pointless to the boy. He already knew Zim's true form, but the alien was supposedly more intelligent than he looked.  
  
"Okay... banana slugs." Zim sneered. "What a subject."  
  
Gir danced around Dib. "Hi!" He waved excitedly as his dog suit paws squeaked against the floor.  
  
"Uh... hi." Dib meekly waved as the SIR lay on the floor, dragging himself over to the televison.  
  
"I gonna watch TV! 'Kay!?"  
  
Zim threw the remote at Gir's head. "Fine. Go. I have to do this WRETCHED report with this WRETCHED human." He gagged slightly.  
  
Dib scowled. "Hey, you ain't great either."  
  
The Irken's eyes widened. "Eh?" He laughed a bit. "I don't think so."  
  
No use in argueing, Dib changed the subject to the paper to be completed. "Okay, we got to get this finished."  
  
"Right..." Giving a heavy breath, Zim picked up the books. He stopped abruptly. "You know," he told the human, "I could just let my computer write this for--" He ended in mid-sentence. "--I mean, I could type this up."  
  
Dib smirked. "That isn't what you said. Also, no, we have to do this ourselves." He frowned. "As much as I despise it, we have to."  
  
"Fine..."  
  
"Hey... you got a bathroom around here?"  
  
Zim gave a brief look of worry. "Yeah, it's in the, uh, kitchen."  
  
"Why?" Dib knew the way to Zim's secret base, he just needed a diversion to get into it. "Nevermind. I'm sure I'll manage." He walked off toward the kitchen section of the house.  
  
Gir suddenly came from nowhere and hung over his master's shoulder. "Hey... ain't that the way down below?" He hummed and tapped on Zim's backpack.  
  
"Fuck!" Zim's breath caught in his throat, causing him to cough roughly. "It is! How could I have let him go! Agh! Stupid banana slugs!" He threw the text down and rushed into the other room.  
  
Skidding to a halt, Gir was bounced forward into a surrounding wall.  
  
"Let's go again! Let's go again!" The robot screamed as he sat in front of the wall he had just thwacked against.  
  
Water was heard as Zim viewed with horror.  
  
"He got in, Gir! HE GOT IN!" He kicked the refridgerator. "Dammit! Dammit! Dammit!"  
  
Joyfully, Gir shouted "Dammit!" mimicking Zim.  
  
"I gotta get down there!"  
  
***  
  
Dib was awestruck as he eyed the lab. There were so many things to see, and the thought of destruction was delicious. He pulled a pair of goggles over his eyes, a pair that would supposedly help locate anything hidden.  
  
"Let's see..." Dib surveyed the area in his range.  
  
He heard a small thump, but thought nothing of it. He continued on.  
  
Pulling out a miniature computer, the boy contacted the infamous Agent Darkbootie.  
  
'I'm in! I'm in! Darkbootie, it's amazing!' Dib exclaimed through typed words.  
  
'You're there? Good job, Mothman. We were uncertain of your tellings.' Darkbootie and two other agents watched the monitor.  
  
'What? Did you think I was lying to you?'  
  
'Uh... no. I was just unsure' Darkbootie was feeling odd to have the youngest member showing a bit of a temper.  
  
'Ack, I gotta leave. I'll give you a full update when I'm through.' The screen clicked out.  
  
"Okay, now that's finish. Now let's --" He halted suddenly, looking upward as he turned. "Zim!"  
  
The Irken hovered high over the boy, using the metallic limbs. "Oh, come on, Dib! You expected me not to know? Pathetic!" He cackled maniacally.  
  
"Fuck..." Dib's eyes hurriedly darted back and forth, in search of an escape.  
  
"No use, Dib! No use!"  
  
  
  
[Who cares what is going to happen! I'll write it anyway! HAHA!] 


End file.
